The Audacity to be Different

In this episode, Danielle shares a deeply personal experience from the launch of her new platform, the Wilderness of Wellness membership. She reflects on the challenges she faced, the distractions that tested her focus, and the bold moves she made to overcome them.

The episode delves into Danielle’s encounter with a web developer who introduced her to the concept of personalized membership platforms. She recounts the journey from the website malfunction in May to the successful launch on January 1st, 2024. Danielle emphasizes the value, user experience, and connections offered by the new membership platform.

Amidst the excitement of the launch, Danielle reveals the distractions and challenges she faced, both external and internal. She shares a moment of realization about the encroachment of New Age practices in her proximity and the need to stay true to her biblical worldview. The episode explores the tension between holistic healing and New Age principles, highlighting the importance of discernment and standing firm in one’s beliefs.

Danielle opens up about the distractions that threatened to pull her away from her mission and how she chose to refocus on her purpose. She emphasizes the need for audacity in pursuing a different path, challenging traditional norms, and being a pattern breaker. The episode encourages listeners to prioritize self-care, set boundaries, and fill themselves first before pouring into others.

In a reflective and transparent manner, Danielle shares her journey of overcoming distractions, staying true to her values, and embracing audacity to make a positive impact. The episode concludes with an invitation for listeners to share their own stories and connect with Danielle on Instagram.

Join Danielle on this insightful and empowering episode of the “Crying in My Cheesecake” podcast, as she inspires you to take audacious steps toward a life filled with purpose and authenticity.

SHOW NOTES

Email Danielle: hello@danielleh21.sg-host.com

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Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cryinginmycheesecake/

Transcription

Welcome to the crying in my cheesecake podcast, where we are in pursuit of living life abundantly, not held back by our body size, nor our symptoms, nor are we held back by our hurts, habits, or other obstacles in life. Learn the secrets to crush it in your health, wellness, relationships, and spiritual life.

I am Danielle, your host and practitioner. In this episode, we are going to go there. I’m going to share something very personal that happened to me last week, or I guess an experience that happened to me last week. But first of all, last week was the launch of my brand new platform for the wilderness of wellness membership and.

I am blown away at the response from all of you. Some of you came and joined because you were part of the podcast community. Some of you are part of my Instagram community. Some of you are, you know, diving deeper and working with me one to one and this Wilderness of Wellness membership, you guys just blew me away.

The platform blew me away as well. The, you know, So, so often we have these dreams, we have dreams that never get to become reality. And I, by happenstance, was not supposed to meet this person in May, but my website, cryinginmycheesecake. com, went down in May. And I only knew that because there were people trying to book in with me, learn more about me, and they were sending me messages on Instagram, they were telling my husband in person, and they were.

I’m telling me an email. Hey, your website’s not working. I don’t know how to get ahold of you. I don’t know how to book an appointment with you. Um, so while I was dealing with that shame and embarrassment cycle, I needed to mess with, you know, like take care of that piece. Um, I had to meet. a gal that was a web developer and she fixed everything behind the scenes as we were talking.

She was just showing me some cool things that she was working on for other clients and other contracts and things. And one of them was a personalized membership. And I’m like, wait a minute, what? Like, this is a thing. So she’s like, Oh yeah, girl, let’s look at this. And so she showed me the behind the scenes of Um, a few memberships that she was working on, I’m just like, Oh my gosh, my mind just blew.

So I just started talking to her because, you know, as a, I do have a very, very small team that helps me, but mostly all of the work done here at Crying on My Cheesecake and in all of my business structures, it’s all done by me. And so I was telling her all of the things and she’s like, Oh girl. And every single time I talked to her, I cried because I’m just like, are you kidding me?

Like, I don’t have to do this much work. I can have it all in one place and I don’t need to like go here and there and here and there monitoring my members and um, things like that. And she’s like, Oh no girl, like this is how it works. And I was like, just like, Oh my gosh. So. Fast forward a few months and I’m like, you know what?

I think I want to do this. I think I just want to go ahead and pull the trigger and have you completely build out my own membership, um, on my own software. At that point I was getting filtered on YouTube and I was getting filtered on my software, The Mighty Networks, that I was hosting my membership on at the time.

And people were having trouble logging in, people were having trouble with lots of things and it was just really annoying. And so I’m like, you know what, instead of conforming to everybody else, I’m just going to pave my own way and do this. I’m going to move forward in faith, so I prayed over it and with lots of hesitation and fear, but also this unsurmounting peace, I went ahead and signed the contract to have my membership built out on my own membership software.

And it finally launched January 1st of this year of 2024, and I cannot believe the amount of value, let alone the user experience and the connections and the easier ways to make connections and get the materials you need and all of that. It’s just, it’s beautiful and seamless, so I just want to extend yet another welcome to all of you new members popping in this past week.

And taking time to take care of yourself at the time of this recording. I’m actually preparing for our new member connection call tonight. where everybody, because it’s a brand new membership platform, so everybody on the platform is going to be meeting tonight to go over what the membership looks like, how to use it, all of that kind of stuff, and make sure that there are no questions or no technology hindrances.

to getting the results that you deserve. So that is so dang exciting. And then Wednesday we have our first monthly call together as a group. And I, like guys, I’m still riding the high of all of this membership stuff because it is so much fun. Um, but all that to say, when you’re doing something big and you’re standing up and doing something different, it’s easy to get distracted.

You know, on a spiritual level, we think about how those who come to Christ who say and surrender their life to Christ and say, yes, I believe Jesus is the son of God, um, that he is, you know, died on the cross, rose again three days later, and he is my, he is my savior. He is the Messiah. So when we say that, we think, oh my gosh, the world’s going to be great.

My life is going to be fixed just in the blink of an eye. And no, that’s not how it works. In fact, the enemy comes to start tempting us and pulling us back into our old lifestyle habits and our old ways of thinking and all of that right away. You know, he did that to Jesus too, after he was baptized. And I’m like, that doesn’t make us any different, right?

Like if anything, we’re going to be following or be treated similar to that and be treated, you know, with our temptations and whatever. And I think that we, we forget about that. And when we do something big and make a statement, there’s going to be distractions. And that’s one of the enemy’s favorite tools and weapons in his arsenal is distraction.

And last week during this beautiful launch, um, opening the doors to the wilderness of wellness, I had quite the distractions happening. And there was just one. That was really big to me. I’m sure that there were others. Actually there were. There was a death. Um, there was sickness. There was fear. There was lots of things.

Um, and I do have a proper military Ceremony and honor graveside service. I need to go to this week. Um, but I let, here’s the big one. I let others distract me last week. I let others have a say in my life, a say in my definitions of what I’m feeling, what I’m going through. I let others have put words in my mouth that did not actually.

What do I want to say? Did not actually define what I was thinking or what I wanted. I let others tell me how, like, it was basic, things were my fault. So, I was faced with this distraction because the Wilderness of Wellness is truly for the woman seeking after Um, seeking after God, uh, the woman that wants to honor God with her body and relationships and, and so forth, and wants to figure out how to work with her body the way God designed it and, um, release all of the things that are no longer belong to us so that we can live life abundantly.

The one that he, the life that he promises us and gives us if we step into it. So last week I was faced with this reality and I know this, right? Like I know online. Okay, the reality is of new age principles Being in the holistic health space. Okay, and while I am, you know, very much a hey This is what I believe about this I would suggest you recommend or recommend you praying over it and getting seeking godly counsel before you do XYZ modalities holistic holistic healing modalities I would I would suggest you pray over it and really think about it get some wise godly counsel And I know that this is in My holistic health space online, but it’s so easy to mute accounts online or hide them or Even put in my like in my Instagram keywords.

I don’t want to see on my feed I can block those things so I don’t see them and I forget that they’re there But last week I had a realization that there are some practices that are very close to me in proximity that are practicing things that I don’t agree with and it’s so It’s so interesting or eye opening to me that the closer I draw to God, especially when I know that this membership is like my ministry, this ministry, it’s a ministry to God’s people.

And it’s like when I surrender to him, I am much more sensitive to things that are not of God. Um, I’m very much more sensitive of, it’s almost like I put these lenses on that have a filter of scripture, have a biblical worldview. Like it’s just, it’s really interesting how that happens like the closer you draw to God.

Okay. So I am last week I was working, you know, in my room on things like behind the scenes with the membership and it’s almost like people that. Um, practice and they call themselves healers, which first of all, there are no healers. There’s one healer and that’s Jesus Christ. But it’s interesting to me how these people take on the name of healer.

They say that they are inters interceding for you in your energy. They say that you are that they are doing all of these things and I’m like, wait a minute Like that’s a red flag like no like I depend on God I depend on my relationship with Jesus For him to help change me and for me to have direct access to him to know exactly what I want And that’s not to say that there isn’t good wise counsel out there I’m not saying that but what I’m saying is when someone comes in and says that they can feel your energy um And it’s, if it’s chaotic energy, if it’s whatever, and then they want to tell you what to do with that, especially without your permission, that is very overwhelming and overstepping.

I also think it’s interesting that these healers that practice New Age tend to bring chaotic energy with them wherever they go. And it’s almost like their energy encroaches upon It encroaches upon others and it is this need to be seen. It’s this need to be known. It’s the scene. It’s this need to, to be healed and to have access to the divine, which is God.

Like it’s the searching. I think that chaotic energy is the searching that endless searching for healing for the healer. And you know, even the word doctor means teacher. So, We, we have a place in this world and you know, I was talking to a friend at church yesterday and he was saying, we were talking about the, the issue with Adam and Eve and how we were talking about feminine and feminine, um, what is that feminine, feminine, feminism, the movement of feminism and how the woman’s.

The woman’s plight is to always be searching and wanting to take the men’s role, the man’s role in life and that head honcho role and not surrender. And that’s always going to be our battle. But it’s like we have our place and I’m using that as an example that we have our place. We are not to be healers, we are to be teachers, we are to be disciplers, we’re to be supporters and we’re supposed to do life together.

But there is no one that knows your tomorrows and knows what decisions you should be making with your life. Other than Jesus because he’s been there to like he’s been in your tomorrows. He’s been in the yesterdays and As a holistic practitioner, I personally take when I work with you clinically I take your health history from birth like even your parents health history And then your health history from birth to your current circumstances right now.

And even then, when you give me that, that is one, your perspective, I’m going to interpret that with my lens of not even just a biblical worldview, but of a naturopathic holistic root cause healing, um, thought. But I’m going to be interpreting that I am not there. I am not the one that is there healing, like healing you.

God created a body for you that can heal itself. It is a miraculous. It’s a miraculous thing. And the whole idea that we. Put ourselves last is is antithetical to worship of God and the the great the the grateful heart that we have that we have this body right now that we get to use on this earth and and help him with his mission that he put us here to be intricately designed to do and I think it’s so all that to say I was so distracted that I when I went to speak up about something Then it was in turn, my eyes were opened to more new age things that you can perform new age.

I’m not saying I agree with this because I don’t, but that you can perform new age Methodologies, I would say under under Jesus’s reign when it is very clear in scripture that we are Not to be messing with those dark energy energetic worlds. We’re not supposed to be messing with Interceding because we are mere flesh.

We are mere mortals and we are going to get it wrong Even if we have a gift of of seeing The energetic, whatever around people, the quantum energy around people, even if we have that gift. It is not ours necessarily to step into that because that’s Jesus’s role because we are so susceptible to sin and temptation and misguidance by the enemy that we don’t even know what we’re tapping into and that could literally lead us astray to death.

It could also lead others if we are tapping into that for other people. So all that to say, I was distracted and when I went to speak up. I learned that New Age is so ingrained in holistic healing that the people are constantly spinning their wheels, looking for this method, this method, this method, and then they wonder why they’re always striving or always seeking or always have to work.

And what’s interesting about New Age is that you have to have someone intercede for you or you have to be working all the time. Whereas in your relationship with Jesus. The whole idea is to not work, it’s to surrender. It’s to surrender and be obedient to his will for your life. And sometimes that will is to stand up and be more bold.

And that’s what I did this past week. I decided, you know what, like, I’m going to, after I made the mistake, I did, I don’t think it was a mistake. It was, well, there were mistakes made on my behalf. Um, but when I spoke up, I was not very clear and I let someone tell me that my problem with the new age modalities that are happening and encroaching in my territory, um, are because of some deep underlying issue that I have.

Um, and that I was exactly like, anyway, it was very interesting how that went down. So I knew I was getting nowhere with that. And so I decided to take some bold moves and one was to stand outside of a door and pray. And pray that God’s will be done. I asked for forgiveness for where I messed up and that God would meet me in that middle and I would still continue to, um, do and believe and stand firm in the word of God.

And so I did that. I felt somewhat better. And then I like sat down back in my office and I’m just like, you know what? Why am I letting this distract me? This is exactly what the enemy wants. So I threw on praise music. I threw on, um, Wynonna Judd and my power music and I’m just like, you know what, no, no more.

So I threw on praise music the rest of the week and just, I didn’t call it power praise, uh, and I threw that on the rest of the week and I’m just like, you know what, no more. No one gets to hold me back, including the enemy, including new age modalities. Anything that encroaches in my place is not. So I had to stand more bold and take audacious moves professionally and personally.

So when I went to Australia last October, we had a retreat and one of our main word was audacious. And the word audacious, the way it was described to me, was The how dare she energy, bold, not worrying what others think of me, power and confidence and being seen, doing it anyway, the no Fs given, daring to be different, wanting more, doing, it’s a doing word, it’s magnetism, it’s not passive, it’s alive, it’s breathing, it’s more than lip service.

And having boundaries, having, um, so Coco, Coco Chanel says, or said, Don’t be like the rest of them, darling. Be a pattern breaker, a rule breaker, um, a disruptor in my industry and in my life. Challenge the traditional norms, the, the, and revolutionize the areas that I’m working in. It requires me to be more refined.

Before I walk out the door, I have to take something off. I have to take something off. I need to think about how do I do things differently? How am I giving a different experience? How can I become more audacious? And I think that we can’t become more audacious if we’re constantly pouring out to everybody else.

And that can look different for everybody and last week for me pouring out to everybody else looked like launching my brand new platform, launching the open door. So having open doors to my membership, but it also looked like me trying to go over the top to make someone feel like they fit in with me when maybe they don’t, or maybe vice versa.

I don’t fit in with them. And it may be because of their beliefs. It may be because of, um, the way they practice their holistic modalities. It may be anything else. I am not, you are not meant to fit in with everybody. And that is pouring out. That’s pouring out that leads to burnout. And I, and I think I keep saying, and I think, cause that’s getting annoying, but I am in this space where I’m like, you know what, where I’m going to pour out, it’s going to matter because every single time I’m pouring out to anybody else, I need to remember that that they are taking, I’m choosing to let them take from me, from my kids.

Every time I meet with somebody, it’s taking away from my marriage. It’s taking away from my kids. It’s an elite opportunity as a woman to have experiences with other people. And it is our responsibility to have radical boundaries that protect us from giving people energy and giving people time and giving people, um, more than the benefit of the doubt, more than the benefit of the doubt, I said specifically, and trying to make someone fit in with you or you fit in with them.

And it, because. That energy is taking away my happiness, my contentment, my excitedness.

I think that we also, I just said it again, um, we also, a daily practice that we need to work on and I need to work on is filling me first. Because if I was filled completely last week, I would not have been easily distracted, would I? If I had maybe taken 10 more minutes. To dive into the commentary and, and, or soap my, um, you know, uh, scripture, whatever it is.

Soap my, do soap notes over my scripture that day instead of just reading. Maybe if I had gotten a few extra steps in that week. Maybe if I had lifted just a few minutes longer. Maybe if I had prayed just a few times more. Filling myself first, and I did forget meals last week, and I was sick last week, and all of those things, like I was depleted.

But we have to fill ourselves first with actual self care before we take on the world. Because really the world’s not ours to take on, is it?

So all of this to say, we need to do things differently, which means that we have to take action. We have to take action and step into it. And I saw a meme or something the other day on Instagram that talked about how Christians usually sit in a lot of trauma and whatever, because they think God’s just going to heal them.

Everything that has to do with our relationship with God, we have to step into it. God is not God. We’re not pawns for him. He wants us to turn to him every single day, every single moment. We have to turn to him which is an action. Turn is an action. It’s a verb.

We have to choose to think differently and when we can’t think properly, um, and we have brain fog and we have afternoon fatigue, we are irritable, we have all these aches and pains and we’re worried about what everyone else thinks about us or making sure that we’re taking care of everybody else or feeling left out or, Oh my gosh, I don’t believe in this but, you know, I’m going to coddle this person anyway.

Hello, I raise my hand right now.

If we’re thinking like that, we’re not thinking differently. We have to think differently and do differently in order to show up for ourselves. We have to let go, take something off every morning. And that may be that taking off is your pride. Pride that I have to show up or otherwise it doesn’t get done because quite frankly, you can’t and I can be replaced everywhere in our lives, except for our children and our marriages.

It’s the truth. We can be replaced anywhere else. And I even say friendships. I’m going to go there because friendships can be replaced like that. Friendships can be replaced because we’ve grown out of them. Think about how many relationships you’ve grown out of. Think about seasonal friendships. Think about how when you move somewhere, you’re going to find new friends.

Friendships can even be replaced. But what cannot be replaced? You have to be there for your relationship with Jesus, with your spouse, and with your children. That’s it.

How do we do that? We do that by being around people that encourage us and point us back to the truth, capital T truth. We do that by being in community with people who are going through similar things as us, who are trustworthy so that, and, and a safe environment so that people can be vulnerable.

Because when we are vulnerable, we create, or we make human connection. Once there’s human connection, change happens. Which is also like watching who you’re around, right? Whoever you are in the most contact with is who you become. It doesn’t matter if it’s through a texting relationship every day. It doesn’t matter what, but that’s who you become.

Be careful who you’re around. Be very picky and choosy. That’s audacious. We also need to eat right. But eating right doesn’t look like getting on a diet plan like Noom, or eating too low of calories and dropping, you know, like being in an 800 calorie deficit every day, or, and then binging on the weekends.

It doesn’t look like the same thing for every single person. Exercise. Moving your body most every day of the week. It doesn’t have to look the same every day, but it does need to be done. These two things alone? Add on sleep, prioritize that sleep, brain fog and irritability should be mostly gone.

Migraines should mostly be gone. Headaches should mostly be gone. It is so important for you and for me to take radical, audacious steps to be different. And you get to. It’s scary at first. It feels very isolating, very lonely. But that doesn’t have to be the place or the way it is. That’s why I created the wilderness of wellness membership.

I created it so that we can be audacious, audacious, or have the audacity to be different because we have to step into it. We have to ask, we have to put down our ego. We have to put down and say, you know what? I have this trauma, but I’m going to take ownership over my actions from that trauma. Or, I used to believe this.

I take ownership that I used to believe this and think this way, but that’s not who I want to be anymore. Help.

I think it’s so important. So important that yesterday I wrote this podcast episode, the outline to it on my sermon notes at church. In fact, I even from that, I fleshed out the next 13 episodes. And why do you think that is? Because I was audaciously. Choosing to be different, to stand up to all of the distraction going on around me, to the fear, the fear of not fitting in, the fear of not being liked, the fear of, um, not, you know, not serving people, the fear of being a failure, whatever it may be.

God’s word is timeless and it teaches us every single day. I let others distract me last week and I don’t want to let them do that again. I don’t want to let them have that power again. And friend, if this hit home with you, come find me on Instagram. Come find me on Instagram at crying in my cheesecake and let’s have a conversation.

I want to hear your story, a story when you were, you let others distract you from whatever was going on in your life because I want you to know that you’re not alone. And quite frankly, it’s nice to hear that I’m not alone too.

Thanks for listening to the crying in my cheesecake podcast. I hope it encouraged you to make a next best step for your health. Take a look at the show notes for more information or other links I mentioned in the episode. And if you got to this point, come find me on Instagram and send me a DM. Tell me you listened to the episode and what you got out of it.

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hey, i’m Danielle

I love Jesus. I love my family. And I get joy from having a front row view of people growing toward their goals because of what I’ve taught.

The Wilderness of Wellness

Everything you need to take back control of your health, start healing, and live your life abundantly, not held back by your body’s symptoms or size.

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A clinical, bio-individual approach to your wellness by looking at your body from a foundational perspective.

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