Can We Stop Making Excuses

The first podcast episode Danielle recorded for Youtube as well, she shares her wisdom when it comes to how excuses actually tell the truth of a person’s commitment to things. In fact, excuses are usually made for commitments that we’ve made ourselves and truly cannot uphold and execute well. This is why we need to make sure we check our expectations for ourselves, for others, and if we are trying to get help for our excuses- make sure the person or people helping you will give you exactly what you need.

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Transcription

Welcome to the crying in my cheesecake podcast, we are doing something different here, different meaning new from here on this episode and forward, I’m actually recording this to be shown on YouTube as well. So my audio video editor strongly, and I mean, and I, and what I mean by strongly is that he strongly.

Used my own words against me and told me to start recording these podcasts as videos as well. And I’m just like, I know I should be, but who wants to put on makeup and do their hair before running downstairs to record? Anyway, if you’re listening to this episode on your favorite podcasting app, you should know that it’s also being video recorded and it is on YouTube as well.

So make sure you go check that out. Give me a subscribe. And I can’t help it. Think when I say, give me a subscribe. If you does anybody watch the 1000 pound sisters with Amy and Tammy and they’re like, like, and subscribe, I can’t help. But think of that every time I say this, but if you could go to YouTube, if you’re a YouTube person, please go to YouTube and hit subscribe.

I think it’s that bell. I think there’s a bell that says subscribe now and send me a thumbs up or a comment underneath moving into this video territory is Ooh, it’s kind of nerve wracking, but it is important to be able to get my messages out to as many people as possible. Even if I have to put a little bit of makeup on, and honestly I had this business mentor and I still have her, and I don’t even know if she listens to the podcast or watches or anything like that.

Lord, I don’t even know if I’m sitting up. I don’t even know if anyway, all the stuff in my background, like, I, I can’t hide anything behind me while I’m talking. So those of you on YouTube. Thank you for watching. And hopefully you’re just listening, not just watching. Okay. But I have this business mentor and one time she went through my Instagram and she told me I needed to do my hair and makeup.

Before going live online. And one of the videos that she referenced when I had COVID like I had, COVID like, I wasn’t going to put makeup on and I wasn’t, I, I was showered, but I wasn’t put together. And honestly, like the more I think about that idea of having to put makeup on and do my hair all the time, that me showing up like that, me showing up with makeup on and hair done all the time is not reasonable.

It’s not who I am. I wake up in the morning for a slow morning. Coffee in my Bible. And I do some creative work for my job for my business before my kids get up. And then I work with my kids on their homeschool and I start meeting with clients around 11 or so, and then I get a workout in, and then I’m with more clients and it’s like that evening rush of dinner and after school activities and all the things for my husband and myself as well.

So all that to say, like, I am not who I, or I am who I am. And honestly, , you’re gonna get what you get. Like if my solid content is solid content, whether the deliverer, whether I look a certain way, Or not whether I look like I just died in a workout or I’m barely alive or not. Like, I think that showing myself up in real life is important and showing that the real me is going to let my content flow more, like create more connection anyway.

So moving on. That information on the meat of this episode is all about excuses and y’all excuses annoy the ever living crap out of me. And I don’t care if they come from me, like I get annoyed with myself. If I hear an excuse, come from myself, or if they come from someone else, I just cannot stand excuses.

Excuses tell me that someone isn’t willing to step up their game or to get better, or to finally leave behind some things that may be good. But not good for right now. And I think that excuses are usually made for commitments that we’ve made and truly cannot uphold and execute. Well, I’m gonna repeat that.

Excuses are usually made. For commitments that we’ve made ourselves and truly cannot uphold and execute well. So I’m gonna, I’m gonna start with that, that this is all about excuses and this is about as an experience that’s happened. And this is the, I don’t even know what week in June, this is that I’m recording this, but it’s June 12th.

So I had. A week in June, this past week where I started something new, I was so freaking excited. And you wanna know why? So here’s the backstory two years ago. So two years ago on July 14th, 2020, I had a pelvic floor reconstruction done and it knocked me off my game. I mean, like. Physically off my game, nutritionally, all the things I was off my game and it opened up a whole new ball of worms.

For me. My doctor told me that I’d have to find a new workout modality. I’d have to find something else instead of what I was doing, that lifting heavy wasn’t in my future. And he told me that running was probably not gonna happen either. I was stunned. And determined when someone tells me that I can’t do something come hell or high water, I am going to prove them wrong.

It’s taken me two years of rehab to get to a place where I can finally lift heavy with power movements, like the snatch and clean. Now, if you’re not familiar with what the snatches, the snatches, like when someone holds a barbell wide grip, so like their arms are kind of out wide and then. Do some, like they do like a deadlift off the ground.

They power it up over their head into a overhead squat and then lift up. Okay. So that is a snatch. A clean is like where it’s more of a narrow deadlift kind of grip and then you power it up, get down into a front squat and then you jerk it up, like after you’ve come up. Anyway, that was a terrible description of it.

Please, please Google. If you’re interested. There’s that, but the snatch and. And so movements like the snatch and clean and movements like kettlebell swings, which I’m sure you know what those are the, ketlebells the things that people swing between their legs. These things have been very, very hard for me.

These movements have been my nemesis since surgery and actually not since surgery, since I’ve been able to move and do these kinds of exercises since surgery, because the, my pelvic floor muscle. Are so weak from being tense and who, for who knows how long? Like, they’ve just been like constantly like this, so they’ve never been stretched and then like contracted and stretch.

They’ve never really been worked out because they’ve always just been in like a knot and honestly, for who knows how long. So for two years, two years of hard work to even get to a place to say, yes, I will join at barbell club was a huge deal for me. It’s like still huge. And. Still so stink and excited about it.

Like so excited because I am an athlete at heart and I will always go and compete as hard as I can. Not just because I can, but I wanna win. I wanna win. I don’t quit. I won’t quit until I mastered a skill needed to compete and be even better. My personal trainer is so amazing to even put up with me, my demanding personality, let alone my body’s own demands.

That don’t always match up with my personal demands. She has encouraged me to join this class because it’s only eight weeks, but in eight weeks I can really start competing in something where I have a chance to flourish. CrossFit. I love CrossFit. I love CrossFit. I absolutely love it, but I do not have the lifestyle right now.

I love CrossFit and CrossFit is something I absolutely love. I love the modality of it. I love the challenge of it. I love the strength and the endurance that comes from it, but I don’t have a lifestyle right now that I can dedicate my life to that modality of competitions. Like I would not, I would not win.

Let’s say that. Like, I would not be a person to place or win and it wouldn’t be a good experience for me. , but I love the demands of Olympic lifting. it’s hard. , it’s really hard. There are multiple points of execution of the lifts. So of each of the different lifts, there are multiple points of execution that could totally go wrong and cause me to lose points, lose a lift or whatever.

And it reminds me of when I was on the mound pitching for softball as a, from a young girl through high school, the only competition I had on the mound was me, my mind, my body having to be in sync with each other. That’s it. I love that challenge where the mind and the body have to be in. Perfect, perfect sync, perfect simulation with one another.

It requires this muscle membrane, this, this, like, this is just what I am. This is what I’m doing. It’s like this machine that is happening. I love it like that. I love being nitpicked for my form for. Pushing myself even further and harder. And I was feeling it all through April and may that something in my life needed to change.

I needed to be in a place of growth again, where I was nitpicked, where I was challenged, where I needed my mind and body to be back in sync. I felt that again. So I was at a place where I said, I could say yes, I’m going to adjoin this Olympic lifting class. And I’ll preface this by saying I am not by any means a group person, I would much rather be taught one to one or simply taught in a group and then execute alone.

I built a gym in my garage because I am not social. I’m not a social worker outer. Like I don’t, I don’t go to a gym to build friendships. I go to the gym to build myself. It’s my quiet time. It’s my sacred space. The space where literally no one talks to me. For my job. I’m constantly talking to people and I’m listening to them, probably listening much more than I’m talking.

And listening is hard. Y’all figuring out from the pieces and parts of the things that people are telling me, trying to put those puzzle pieces together and guide them on their next right step. Not to overwhelm them, not to overwhelm them, but meet them where they are. It’s hard. And the thing is I carry so much of the weight of what my clients bring to the table that I need my alone time, that sacred space, where I can connect my mind and my body together on the same page and challenge myself and worship my savior dance around.

Like I’m, I’m just crazy worshiping my savior that I get to move and challenge the body that he gave me. I can listen to him, speak in my heart and my mind. I, I can refresh me and restore me. It is sacred. In fact, my kids know they’re not allowed to talk to me when I’m on my black, I call it the blacktop, but the blacktop is kind of confusing because our driveway is also asphalt.

So it’s blacktop. But my blacktop, I call it my blacktop. If, when I am on my blacktop, they cannot talk to me unless they’re bleeding, someone is dead or they have broken a limb and you know, what’s interest. the way I Revere that area. I appreciate that they honor that as well. And the thing is, is that it’s respect.

They respect that space because when they enter into that space as well, They want to experience what I experienced. They want to see, like they can see the changes in their mom when she steps off that mat from when she first stepped on. So like it’s an honor and it’s a respect thing. So when I say I’m not a group person, I can tell you walking into that, that class, at that gym, the gym that I’ve only ever used for personal training with my coach, I was walking into a very vulnerable situation for myself.

I knew no one. There was a coach. She was my hand therapist, but there was a coach coaching, another class, like she wasn’t even part of mine. She was in the middle of taking care of other people. No one knew my story, nothing. They saw me and created their own judgements on me. And I, I like that in a way, honestly, it makes it so I don’t have to live up to an expectation.

Other than my own. It’s been a long time that I’ve been in a place where people were more knowledgeable about a topic than me and I needed that, that part, or that was part of me joining a class to make myself feel uncomfortable. When was the last time you forced yourself into something uncomfortable versus choosing the safety of comfort?

You know, that first week of Olympic lifting was D. It rocked my boat for sure. My routine, my lifestyle, my comfort, everything was rocked so much so that by Thursday of the first week of class, I ugly cried the whole way home from the gym. And I say all the way home in in my little area of Southwest Ohio, nearly everything’s within 10 minutes, except for this gym, it was about a 25 minute drive each way.

And I ugly cried for 20 of those 25 minutes. Being forced into discomfort. Monday through Thursday had finally gotten to me mentally and physically, physically my pelvic floor seized up. And I wasn’t able to finish my workout, which was in the grand scheme of things. The last two things I couldn’t do was accessory work and it, it matters, but it’s not important, but I couldn’t finish my workout because I couldn’t even stand up without my hips and pelvic floors seizing.

It was so bad. I ended up taking some herbal muscle relaxers just to go to bed that night. It hit me mentally because I realized that what was happening and why I was probably, or probably why I was supposed to be in the class in the first place that there were some things that I’d kept inside that I didn’t even know were still there.

I still had this belief that no matter how hard I work, I’m always second best or no matter how hard I work, I’m never good enough. And I sobbed, I ugly cried at that lie that bubbled out. How the heck does that have anything to do with this Olympic lifting class? With my pelvic floor, with my body, with, with everything.

The whole reason why I was joining was to be challenged. Right. But it has everything to do with it. Everything. As a kid, I never had to work hard for excellent grades. I was a natural. When it came to sports, I was naturally talented and gifted in places that many wished they’d had. But somehow that was never enough growing up.

I had to perform, or I believed I had to perform to be seen my grades, my sports. I made sure I got into the local newspapers, made sure I left a good reputation for my parents’ name. I’d perform and perform. And eventually I lost myself. At about 15 years old, I finally knew I was different, but I had to keep holding it in my real self.

Wasn’t actually allowed to be shared. It wasn’t allowed to be shared my real self who had real feelings real needs. It didn’t matter. In fact, I got in trouble multiple times for showing any form of emotions that what, that didn’t include righteous, anger, only doing so all of this, my, I didn’t get to show my real self who.

Who had real feelings real needs. It didn’t matter, right? Like that part didn’t matter. Only doing what my parents expected mattered. Again, this is my interpretation and how I lived my life out of my interpretation, what the community expected. That’s what mattered grew up in a very small town. My home church right now has more members in it than it does than my hometown does.

There’s one stop light. Same people, mostly live there. When I was a junior in high school, I continued to suffocate and I started breaking. I’d say that’s when I really struggled the most in my life was when I was a junior in high school. I wanted seen for who I was not what I did. Fast forward to today.

I’m still healing. I’m still the woman who has put in so much work so much time and money into healing to still feel like I wasn’t enough because I couldn’t finish that workout. And had that pain happen, that pain just kind of came up. That’s what sent me into an ugly cry. It reminded me of all the work I used to do.

And at that moment I felt like, oh my gosh, this isn’t done. This work has to keep going. Instead of wallowing. I cried had the ugly cry, all that kind of thing. Instead of wallowing, though, I decided to pray and seek God and ask for clarity. I realized I got to ugly cry and experienced that because I’m not that girl anymore.

It was almost like this release or this awakening that just. I let it go. I’m not that girly anymore. I chose to head into this class. I chose to head into this class to learn something new and challenge myself. It wasn’t a matter of earning my, keep it wasn’t about learning or excuse me. It’s about learning and building, learning a new skill, learning new connections in my body, building my mental resilience and physical resilience together.

It was about becoming a whole new person. After these eight weeks I had. Clarity my mind was the clearest. It has been in two stinking years, thanks to the pandemic crap, but it was the clearest I’d had in two years. My brain was firing at high speeds. Again, I felt a rush of vision, clarity, purpose, resilience.

I felt strong again, like really strong walking into a room and commanding eyes upon me without even. That may sound arrogant, but it’s not. I do walk into a room and I know people aren’t looking at me because I’m weird. Well, maybe I am weird, but because I have a presence that is one of confidence and strength, and I look ahead and I look at every single person in the face in front of me.

I always have, but now, now I can. Own it, it is who I am. That clarity led me to being able to speak up for myself and, and have a forced confrontation about some issues I was having. It wasn’t about me, but it was about how something was being run. And I wasn’t satisfied with my product. Shall we say it gave me the confidence to.

This, this ugly cry, this clarity, this prayer that brought about all of this clarity. It gave me the confidence to confront when excuses were laid out in front of me, I am full of grace, but I’ll see through the crappy excuses and challenge those. Why? Because I demand better for myself. I demand better for myself because no one else will, because I need to make my own way.

I need to change the generational stories. My generational stories with me, I demand better than excuses because five years ago I told myself no one, not even myself is allowed to get in the way of my health and fitness. No one. And someone had gotten in the way of that this week. I didn’t recognize myself honestly, in the moment because I was like, dang old me.

Would’ve just skipped those workouts for lack of communication. But this new me is demanding that I be met where I am and taken to where I wanna be. Who the heck am I? Oh, I’m the same woman who’s doing that for her clients too. If you didn’t know, in my full time job, I’m a nutritional therapy practitioner who helps people who feel weak, climb their Everest so that they can live life abundantly.

The life we are supposed to live. If our bodies are physical, being our mind, our mental being our spirit, our emotional being. If, if those things were not holding us back to live life abundant. I have a whole team, a team of practitioners and assistant to support you. If you feel like you’re being held back by your body, come check us out.

Head to crying in my cheesecake.com. I’ll link it down in the show notes for you and click on meet team C I M C the links are there to schedule, like, learn who we are, learn who we are, learn, learn what kind of clients we work with. Cuz each of us works with someone just a little bit differently or different.

So click the link in the, they underneath the name and schedule a free discovery call with that practitioner. Or even start working with that practitioner of your choice. But what I’ve learned from working with clients, from meeting them where they are to where they want to be. And even through my own healing.

There’s a few things. I’ve learned a few things here. The first thing is that resolutions to conflict may not actually be about getting your way, but they are about getting an answer. So let me talk about this for this, for this resolution, the conflict I had was I had to confront this person. That I bought a product from, and I was expecting something that wasn’t actually given.

So when I buy something, I’m expecting it to do something for me and it doesn’t work the way I want it to work or the way I expected it to work. I was confused. Conflicted and decided to confront my problem instead of just let it fester inside me. So the resolution I got from this confrontation is that, well, Danielle, you need to ask, before you pay, you need to ask what the routine or expectations or how the format of this product or program is going to work, ask about it before you pay.

Don’t just assume that people are going to perform the way that you want them to perform or the way. I would perform so ask before you pay. And that was an answer I got from getting this resolution. My, the conflict is not, the conflict is solved because I got my resolution. So I, I got my answers. And then the other thing is, is I probably will not rejoin this class.

Unless things change. I will probably not rejoin this class because you do pay for, you do pay for what you get. How about that instead of just paying for what you get, I’m going to choose to pay for what I actually need and what I actually probably need is more communication. And I will pay for that. So again, I’m not going into the whole details of the confrontation, but resolutions may not be getting, you may not get your way.

But you will get an answer. So ask before you pay for something, ask before you join something, ask before you agree to doing something, ask before you say yes, I will commit to that. Ask before you put, put some kind of stake in, right. And then. Pay for what you actually need. So if you are, let’s just say you’re joining weight Watchers and weight Watchers is not giving you that personalized attention that you need.

You know, they, they sell you on making you a personalized meal plan and like, you know, everything is all about you, but really what it does is they, it goes into a computer and a computer says, oh, okay. That mostly answers for this goes to this plan. So you’re actually on the same plan as someone else. So.

Pay are you go ahead and buy that? And you’re like, yes, this is awesome, but you didn’t ask. And so you’re disappointed. The resolution is actually pay. If you want that personalized attention, then you need to pay someone to walk alongside you. A qualified individual that can walk alongside you to maybe get to the root cause of your, if it’s weight Watchers, your weight issues, or if you have thyroid issues, your thyroid problems, again, team CMC can help you with that.

Just saying there’s another little, there’s another little plug for my. Team for you, but ask before you pay, pay for what you actually need, commit to what you actually need. The second thing I’ve learned is that kids are not an excuse, and this is something, this is something that’s been on my mind at much in different.

How would I say different realms, but kids are not your excuse. They’re a purpose and they’re a higher calling using kids as an excuse for your lack of commitment is damaging to your children and other relationships. Kids are not, who are holding you back. You are holding you back. And what I’m wondering is like, people will say, oh my gosh, my kids were sick.

Like, I, I didn’t have time. Okay. I have three children. They’ve all been sick at the same time, including me. And yet the world doesn’t end. Like the world doesn’t stop. So. Honestly, sick kids are only a challenge when our pride is before or our selfishness comes before our children. So if we’re like, oh my gosh, my kid was up all night.

I’m so tired. I couldn’t do X, Y, Z. Well, that’s not the case. You could have done X, Y, Z, but should you have even had to have done X, Y, Z was X, Y, Z even meant to be on the plate right now. Kids are not an excuse and they don’t hold you back. Kids are not an excuse. They’re a purpose and a higher calling in life.

They are not a reason to drink, to be late to something or to fail at your commitments. In fact, if they, if you are too busy or they are too busy, then maybe it’s because you shouldn’t have kids in 18 different activities. And maybe just start with one, there’s no reason to have kids in 18,000 different activities like none.

So that being said, if you choose to home, Cool. I am a homeschool mom too, and I absolutely love it. It just the best thing for our family. It’s the best thing we could have done. I don’t wanna be ruled by government only. I don’t want my kids to even taught things that, that they don’t need to learn. Let them learn the things that they need to learn with me and in a safe place, in a safe environment, with the same biblical out outlook and worldview of things, totally tracking on that.

And even if you’re not, if you’re listening. If you’re not a biblical believer, even you have your own ways that you want things done. And so I’m totally like tracking with that, but homeschool is also not an excuse. To not meet your commitments. Maybe we shouldn’t make commitments that don’t reflect our priorities and I’ll get into that next third.

The third thing I’ve learned is that weekly schedules are not an excuse. Now I’m talking about literally talking about working with my clients. I’m talking about excuses, period, cuz these are the top three excuses I get from clients or I hear throughout the day or I hear in relationships or confrontations I’ve had, I’ve heard.

That weekly or that my schedule is just too busy. I’m just too busy. And so that one bothers the crap outta. Because we all have 24 hours. And you know, what’s interesting is that we have control over more of those 24 hours than we think something I do with my clients is I have them time block set down eight hours, just mark off eight hours immediately for, for bedtime time block that if you are busy, like I am, I have timer set all over my phone.

I have multiple devices. I’m looking at my iPad sitting here too, but I have multiple devices. Ping and Bing and like, remind me, Danielle, you have a meeting with, so and so at this time, Danielle, get your workout and Danielle do this. Like, I literally put everything in there. I even said a timer that reoccur weekly and says, pick up this child, pick up this child.

So I don’t forget a child. And I know that that sounds like, oh, I don’t wanna be ruled by that, but you know what? I’m happier. My, all of my things get done. I actually get to rest. I actually get to sleep. I actually get my workouts in. I actually get to meal plan. I actually get to meet or make my own meals.

I actually get to have relationship with my husband and each of my three children. I’m happier that I haven’t forgotten a kid or that I haven’t over committed myself because it on my calendars, I literally have time blocks and I’m like, oh, I’m sorry. I mean, I would love to go and volunteer and help with that.

Like even today, today it’s sun it’s Sunday. And there was, what was it that I wanted to volunteer and do? There was something I wanted to volunteer and do. And I’m like, man, I would be so good with that. That would be so much fun. But then in the back of my mind, I’m like, okay, Danielle, where are you gonna put that?

How can you commit to that? I can’t commit to it because I do have such a busy schedule and it doesn’t fit. So even the good things, even the good things may not be good right now. So I time block, I recommend my client’s time blocking even loosely time blocking, but if something. That’s super awesome lanes in your lap, but it doesn’t fit your priorities.

Then you probably shouldn’t add anymore to your plate. So let me talk about this. I believe I talked about this in season one, but let me go through this real quick. So my, I have three priorities in my life. Period. Three priorities. One is self-care and self-care to me means my time and my Bible, my spiritual health.

If I am not taking care of, I can’t do the other two things. The other two priorities. So I take care of. By reading my Bible, going to church, taking care of my spiritual life and whatever methods it needs. My mental health. I take care of my physical health by getting my workouts in and I get my, my nutrition in and I have accountability for these things.

And it’s also going to the, my routine doctor’s appointments, getting blood work, done, anything that has to do with me is my self care. Getting to the dentist, all those things. That is my self-care. Okay. Notice I, what’s not on there getting my nails done, getting massage all like the things that we think are a priority in self-care.

Those things are not on my. Those are not a priority to me if they get done awesome. If they don’t okay. Not, not needed. My second priority is my family, and that includes my husband, my relationship with my husband, making sure that he and I are communicating always on the same page. They, one of my husband’s friends, a long, long time friend would make fun of us because we would literal, like we have always.

All day long from our first, from the first part of our relationship, we send emails, we send text messages. Now we didn’t have text messages back then when we were dating, but we send text messages, we send emails and we usually call at least once a day if we’re not together. But even if he’s in the house, working in the basement and I’m upstairs or I’m in another room, I will still send him text messages to make sure we’re on the same page.

That kind of communication takes work and takes time and takes forethought. I could totally completely ignore him all day. Because I could find myself surrounded in so much work and things and then be like, oh my gosh, I didn’t even communicate with my husband. We’re on the same page. What, what just happened?

And then soon that like that lack of communication quickly dwindles to getting irritated with him because he didn’t know X, Y, Z. Well, because I didn’t communicate X, Y, Z. I didn’t make that a priority. So communication with him. Our relationships, our routines together, all of those things. That’s part of my family, homeschooling my kids spending one on one time with my kids, making sure my house is habitable making it’s not habitable at the moment if you came over and looked, but like just making sure that everything that has to do with my family and my family life, my family relationships of my husband and my three children, we are on the same page.

Okay. My third thing is my business, anything and everything that has to do with my business. Now, when I make decisions, I assess, I ask the question. To all three of these things. Let’s just say I had, let’s just say I have, like in August I have a conference that’s coming up and I had to go through I’m like, okay, should I go to this conference?

Will I say, how will this affect my self care? Well, I may not have access to the type of gym equipment I need, but I can say yes to it because I can get my workouts in. Prior to that. Okay. So it’s a yes here. How does this affect my family life? Well, my husband’s gonna have to be home. The we’re gonna be on different time zones.

It might affect our communication. It takes time away from homeschooling with my children. It takes all these things, but it’s a yes, because my husband agreed to step in to those extra roles. So he agrees and we’re on the same page that it’s. So two yeses, the third thing, how does it affect my business?

Well, it’s gonna make my business grow because it’s going to better. It’s gonna continue my education toward my, toward nutrition, holistic wellness and all of that stuff. So I was able to say yes to that event because it passed all three of those priorities. The the test. So I hope that that makes sense, but make sure that nothing, if it’s good for one, make sure it’s good for all of all three of your priorities, because just because it’s good does not mean it’s good right now.

And then the other thing I would say about this excuse of, well, my weekly schedule is just too busy is don’t use the excuse of I’m busy and the I’m busy. I haven’t had time take things off of your list. Delegate, get help, or remove that access. The excess change your verbiage. I didn’t make time. So instead of saying, oh, I didn’t have time.

I will say, like, let’s just say someone texts me and I didn’t respond back to them for a week or something. And I will say I didn’t make time or I’ll say it wasn’t a priority to me. I cannot commit to responding to your text messages right now. And that is a boundary. That is a way to put up a boundary of like, okay.

Just because I have free time doesn’t mean that I’m available. Does that make sense? Like, just because I have free time does not mean I’m available. It means that I need time too. I need time as well. And just because I’m not working or it’s not my business hours, it does not mean I have time. It means, or I’m sorry.

It doesn’t mean I have time for you. It doesn’t mean I have time to do X, Y, Z. So. All this to say that you have more control than you think you don’t have to have a busy life and you don’t have to overcommit to what you can’t do right now, but I’d also encourage you to think about your comforts. Where are you comfortable right now?

Where are you willing to push those limits of comfort and move into the uncomfortable in order to grow? It may not be Olympic lifting like it is with me, but it may be getting up earlier to get a workout in or getting into your Bible. It could be choosing to meal prep on Monday and stick to your plans for the week instead of eating crap food to get back, you know, you weren’t an afterthought, you were not an afterthought.

Your whole being is not an afterthought. You were knit so intricately in your mother’s womb for a specific time, such as this. Don’t live your life as an afterthought, don’t run through the drive through just because you forgot to make plans. This week’s for this week’s food. Don’t forget to work out because you don’t feel like it.

Or it’s been such a hard day. Make yourself a priority. Change yourself. Challenge yourself. Become better. Did you like this episode? Do you know that I hire help in editing these podcast episodes so that I can make more content for you? If you’d like to support the show, please go to buy me a coffee.com/cmc.

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hey, i’m Danielle

I love Jesus. I love my family. And I get joy from having a front row view of people growing toward their goals because of what I’ve taught.

The Wilderness of Wellness

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