I don’t like portion control.
I don’t like when there is this warm, chocolate chip cookie, luring me to it.
I don’t like something controlling me, either.
This past Thanksgiving weekend was eye opening as to just how important my diet and exercise are, especially when pregnant. I’m at high risk for gestational diabetes and preeclampsia because I’ve had it once before, with Dietrich. This whole pregnancy, just like with Daylan’s, I’ve exercised a lot and really watched my food intake.
But Thanksgiving happened. I thought, “What harm would it be to not exercise for four days in a row? Who cares if I just splurge for the weekend?” Yeah my body cares, that’s who. This weekend my blood sugars were very high and I couldn’t get them under control. What’s possibly worse? I gained five yes FIVE pounds in four days.
Immediately I called my endocrinologist to get myself started with blood sugar monitoring and I started my diet back again of little to no carbs and lots of greens and lots of protein. It’s taken me four days to lose only two of those pounds. It’s taken me four of those same days to get my blood sugar back under control with my diet and exercise.
This afternoon as I was standing over my George Foreman grilling some marinated chicken breasts for my spinach salads, I just wanted to cry. But I didn’t.
I desired with the depths of my soul for this baby. It’s my responsibility to feed and treat my body as best I can so it can be a safe haven for our little man as he continues to grow. It’s not his fault if I get sick or if he’s born early. It will be mine and my bad decisions of food and lack of exercise.
While reading you may think I’m over the top obsessive. But you may not have had a preemie that had to stay in the NICU. You may not have had a period of time where you couldn’t hold your brand new baby for days. You also may not have had to see him struggle and cheer him on to breath on his own or eat from a bottle.
Portion control is important, not just for my health, but for the health of my unborn baby and his future.
I’m learning slowly, just how important portion control is on all levels. I’m the typical American who tends to err on the side that more is better. Where does that end? More square footage in my house? Though I do think wanting two bathrooms isn’t asking too much, is it? More food in my pantry and freezers. I don’t know when our money may be slim. More food consumption bc I don’t like to feel the pangs of hunger. More clothes to make me feel good about myself out in public. More…
Instead of sitting in the car, feeling the hunger in my stomach, salivating over a Starbucks chocolate chip cookie and coffee, today I chose to run back into the house for a banana and a piece of cheese.
It’s a choice. An active choice.
And I pray that I continue to actively choose portion control in all areas of my life. Because it isn’t about the cookies. In fact, portion control isn’t about me.
photo credit: Saturday Night Cookies via photopin (license)
